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Good Samanglitans

Some of my readers are strange – like the lonely South Asian doctor looking for a British Wife.


Dr. mahendra sharma (mahendra_sharma97@[removed].com) on Wednesday, October 11, 2006 at 07:42:48
Subject: marry with english lady
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ready for marry
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But the vast majority are good people, similarly tickled and fascinated by the ways the most widely-used language on Earth is tortured and twisted and mistranslated into Manglish Here are some generous submissions from Arlen, Anthony Dawson, Steph Z Guan, Thomas Waldron, and Halima Brewer. Thanks for sending these in, folks!

I’m firmly of the belief that any danger sign should be understood at a glance. For this, I’d have to break out my word-of-the-day calendar. By then, I may already be dead.

Baby Pudgy should come with baby glucophage and a baby stomach staple.

Whatever happened to, “Give a hoot, don’t pollute?”

What’s with all these barbarian tourists they’re talking about? Are the Vikings back? Horned helmets and fanny packs?

You’re no fun – the only reason I came here was to fall down.

Fatal Drawing? What manner of creature lives in the Bridge Kiosk anyway?

Somewhere there’s a flower with John Travolta’s face. John Woo should be ashamed of himself, if not for the flower defacing, then for this line from, “Hard Target,” his first US movie. A lady is asking the mulleted Jean Claude van Damme about his past.

“Why are you named Chance?”
“My Momma took one.”

Shame on you, John. Shame.

Hi Labrador! I’m Golden Retriever, of the Minneapolis Retrievers. Awfully kind of the person who submitted his to blur the pedestrian, though I’m not sure it was necessary. It’s not like the guy’s shirt said, “I’m Hamas,” or “I’m IRA,” or “I’m Mormon.”

Lilang definitelty guided me to comprehend life and enjoy the grace feeling. i owe her everything. What is she, you ask? Why she’s a pair of khakis, of course. I ooze Sagacity.

Trust No One.

I can’t resort? No pitchmen? This place sucks! Come on, let’s go spit in the stairwell.

Go see if Isaac and Captain Stubing are ready to depart.

If it’s safe, why does it need attention? WHAT ARE YOU NOT TELLING ME DOCTOR?

Whoa there, Typhoid Mary – I’m not sucking any kind of phenol, even to protect the wet composition. And since when does Small Pox have MILK? That must taste glossily.

Tasty Couture.

very subtle.

Anthony Dawson says, “On returning to my room I found this under my door :-) ” It’s good to know the Chinese have solved the Bealth Care Crisis. How many people order the “Male Sexual Funtion Obstacle?” “Hi – yeah, my libido is out of control – can you send up some Estrogen and Hugh Grant movies?” Or is it some sort of outdoor Boot Camp for people with Erectile Dysfunction? I’m intrigued…

JET THIS MATTER AROUND PUBES THEN THE MAGICAL IMPRESSION WILL APPEAR AMID FIVE OR TEN MINUTES. I don’t care what it is – any matter jetted around pubes will likely have the same effect. This is genius – “caduceus flower of coition?” “The woman of erotic apathy is remedied to be classy?” I don’t need to add anything – I say it aloud and can’t stop laughing. excuse me while I wait for my magical impression. Here it comes…

January 20th, 2007 | Category: Manglish

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