Friday, June 11, 2004
the Arcata, CA police blotter
poetry and pilfery in the form of pithy posts and even haikus!
5:13 p.m.
A cacti array
Beckoned at a marketplace
One left, unpaid for.
9:45 a.m. Two persons at the Intermodal Transient Facility lost the vegetation required for a wake-and-bake.
11:38 a.m. Leaving shiny goodies in your unlocked car turns the vehicle into a donation bin for the Sticky Fingered Army.
2:57 p.m. A shirtless man was reported bathing in the Plaza drinking fountain, though technically he was washing his hair.
4:41 p.m. A man reported that a 25-page court transcript from his DUI trial was missing from his room. Hate it when that happens.
8:50 p.m. What sounded like a fight in a downstairs Union Street apartment was a woman suffering an attack of Tourett Syndrome.
9:25 a.m. Sugar in the gas tank? Y’know, some people never really graduate from high school.
8:41 a.m. A rugged outdoorsman set up camp in the bushes beside City Hall, where lots of police officers hang out. Somehow he got a ticket.
1:19 p.m. The day’s sweatshirted-man-screaming-in-the-street quota was fulfilled on J Street.
Friday, May 14 1:30 a.m. Two men voiced objections to Arcata’s demographic makeup in front of a Valley West store. After commenting that there are "too many hippies in town," one of the men did the only logical thing - uprooted decorative foliage from a planter and threw it at a window, then got in his car and drove away. The window didn’t break, the plant was replanted and the hippies still frolic, gambol and reproduce.
I wish all public services were this smart (ass)...
A cacti array
Beckoned at a marketplace
One left, unpaid for.
9:45 a.m. Two persons at the Intermodal Transient Facility lost the vegetation required for a wake-and-bake.
11:38 a.m. Leaving shiny goodies in your unlocked car turns the vehicle into a donation bin for the Sticky Fingered Army.
2:57 p.m. A shirtless man was reported bathing in the Plaza drinking fountain, though technically he was washing his hair.
4:41 p.m. A man reported that a 25-page court transcript from his DUI trial was missing from his room. Hate it when that happens.
8:50 p.m. What sounded like a fight in a downstairs Union Street apartment was a woman suffering an attack of Tourett Syndrome.
9:25 a.m. Sugar in the gas tank? Y’know, some people never really graduate from high school.
8:41 a.m. A rugged outdoorsman set up camp in the bushes beside City Hall, where lots of police officers hang out. Somehow he got a ticket.
1:19 p.m. The day’s sweatshirted-man-screaming-in-the-street quota was fulfilled on J Street.
Friday, May 14 1:30 a.m. Two men voiced objections to Arcata’s demographic makeup in front of a Valley West store. After commenting that there are "too many hippies in town," one of the men did the only logical thing - uprooted decorative foliage from a planter and threw it at a window, then got in his car and drove away. The window didn’t break, the plant was replanted and the hippies still frolic, gambol and reproduce.
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