This is on the door to my office here in SAN FRANCISCO. It all made sense when the Chinese subcontractors came to change the names on the doors. Look, you’re good at making the signs, but can’t you paste the text into Word and see if it complains before cutting??
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Found in a supermarket in Amman, Jordan. MY MOPPET.
She’s thirsty…but wait. What’s that?
Is that a threat? No wonder no one had bought you yet. I WILL PASS, THANKS.
so there we were in Amman, Jordan. Graciously being shown around by my good friend’s sister. We entered a store, me in search of manglish and trinkets.
But then something caught my eye. Amidst a bunch of books strewn on the floor, lay one that screamed out, “Hi there, neighbor!”
JCVD! Apparently the Jordanians have a refined taste in men. The arabic says something like, “The life & fighting art of Jean Claude Van Damm.” I told my friends I wanted it, and they asked how much. The owner responded with a high price. Nadia laughed and said NO WAY. The owner stammered, “But it’s one of my best sellers!” Even he couldn’t believe what he’d just said, so he relented.
There his majesty is, posing with the patron saint of kung fu.
And again, with his “gay lumberjack” outfit. This goes on for a few pages. And hey, why does it say, “METH” on bruce’s leg?
Some contextless shots of Bruce Lee again. Just thrown in for flavor.
a series of uncomfortable fighting poses and unexplained moves.
Okay – an overview of the fists in this system. The half-assed ram, the dagger fist, and WTF? Donatello?
When learning the Way of Jean Claude Van Damm, it’s essential to know how the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles would perform it.
But wait – the Turtle hasn’t moved. Perhaps it’s because he’s just turtle slow.
The turtles do their own thing while the fetus from Aliens looks on.
GOD I WISH I HAD THIS AS A POSTER
the five fists of van damm, AND the shitting turtle form.
A groin punch with a gigantic fist seems like a cheap shot.
Disco guy gets owned by van damm’s turtle fighting system. The whole book seems to be a poorly hand-drawn copy of “Tao of Jeet Kune Do” (Bruce Lee) interspersed with Jean Claude and the ninja turtles. A truly inspired creation.
A fantastic find in a land of untapped manglish. More to come. Salaam! |
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